stupidest questions from customers
Q: will this fix my life?
A: absolutely not. but you'll look funnier while it falls apart.
Q: is this t-shirt unisex?
A: no. it files your taxes.
Q: does it come with confidence?
A: no. but people might think you have some.
Q: can i wash it?
A: preferably. we're weird, not monsters.
Q: is the print permanent?
A: longer than most relationships.
Q: what if i order the wrong size?
A: blame yourself. then check the size guide you definitely didn't read.
Q: can i return it if i suddenly hate myself?
A: unfortunately, we only accept returns for the t-shirt.
Q: will people judge me?
A: yes. that's kind of the point. and they already do it anyway bro
Q: is this appropriate for work?
A: depends. are you planning to quit today?
Q: do you have customer support?
A: emotionally? no.
Q: is it worth the money?
A: no, actually it worth more money, but we damn decent people
Q: where are you based?
A: somewhere between good ideas and poor decisions. (also bern.)